I’ve always dreamed big, however, a large part of my life those dreams terrified me, because I never felt ready or good enough to start doing what I want to do. Hence, I came up with so many things that I could do in case my main goal turn into failure. I graduated with two different degrees, some random courses, and diplomas. You know, just in case. And after a while, all those things that were supposed to be only backup plans started to play the main role in my life. I realized that I was creating so many plans “B”, that plan “A” relegated to the background.
Don’t let plan “B: take over until you know for sure that plan “A” won’t work.
I had drifted far away from my big life goal (frankly, I haven’t done anything in this direction for years). And yet plan “A” was to be a writer. Great writer. A fucking novelist. Not a content writer or journalist, not a teacher, makeup artist, or a manager. So how did this happen? How did I became a back-up version of myself? Well, I think sometimes we get so worried that we might miss out that we focus more on plan “B” than on what we care about. But I’ll tell you something: worry won’t take you anywhere. If you really want to go for a ride of your life better arm yourself with faith and patience because this is what you will need to get where you want to go. Worrying is nothing more than self-sabotaging. Why provide the mind with pictures of everything that might go wrong? Feed on a vision of what can work!
I can see lots of people who get lost in the same way – all those who dream of being artists, cosmonauts or actors all their lives, but choose to study business or management because it’s “more secure”. Sure, I’ll agree that you must have a backup plan, but first, do your best to do what you really want.
What matters to you in the first place?
Some people search for purpose a long time and that’s okay. However, if you already know what your “A” plan should be, stop and think.
Answer yourself: how badly you want it? Are you ready to sacrifice other things and even people in your life, your comfort, time or free evenings that you could spend more enjoyably? If the answer is yes, then pool your strength, make up your mind and promise yourself to do EVERYTHING to achieve it. Seriously, make a promise.
Then answer are you trying hard enough? Did you do everything in your power? If your life were depended on reaching your goal, what else would you do? What would you not do?
Shift your focus on what’s really matter
Give more time and attention to what you care about, not what might come in handy when the big plan doesn’t work.
Don’t put off the ‘real thing’ until later, don’t wait for a better moment, because such a moment will never come. What you have to do may frighten you, but do it anyway. Perhaps you are terrified by possibility of being judged by others or the possibility of failure. Grit your teeth and expose yourself to it – it’s the only way to break out of your circle of fright. If you experience what you fear, the fear will cease to exist.
Try hard and give it your best because yes, you can have a back-up plan, but you can’t have a back-up life.